You may not have known it, but January is the month that most people file for divorce. In fact, lawyers have actually picked a specific date for D-Day — as in, divorce day: The first Monday after the kids return to school. So, why January? Jill Brooke, a contributor to FirstWivesWorld.com, a support network for women contemplating, navigating or moving beyond divorce, says the logic is that no one wants to ruin a child’s Christmas. If you divorce over the holidays, then they’ll be always associated with a traumatic event. In addition, there are other factors contributing to January being D-Day time:
- Lawyers and counselors take vacations over the holidays, courts are closed, and couples can’t file for divorce, but they’re back in January.
- One more bad necktie for Christmas was the last straw. The lack of effort in gift giving becomes an example of no effort in the marriage altogether.
- Also, in the winter, forced togetherness indoors can drive couples nuts.
- Another reason? One person makes a resolution not to have another holiday with their spouse.
- Facing the New Year with someone you no longer love is a depressing reality.
- Also, the Monday after Martin Luther King Jr. weekend is a big day for splits. By that time, children have gotten back into the rhythm of school and life. They have their friends around them, so parents feel that a family breakup is less jarring.
It sounds bleak, but it doesn’t have to be. On the positive side, appointments for marriage counselors also go up in January, meaning that some couples decide to work on their relationship, and not give up just yet. Studies show that couples who do stay together during rough patches are happier five years down the line than couples who divorce.
So, if you’re feeling stressed about your marriage this month, know that you’re not alone. If you still have hope that you can work through your doubts, talk to a professional.